Monthly Archives: May 2019

May 08

Statistics, Love, Dating and Relationships – Don’t Take Things Personally

By Marcus Neo | Journals

If you’re actively attempting to better your dating life by approaching and trying to get more ‘leads’ into your phone. Sooner or later you’re going to realize that dating is a numbers game. It’s a game of statistics.

Statistics and Love

If you make it a point to approach 3 women every day, that’s 90 women a month. Let’s assume out of 10 women, you get a strong ‘lead’. That’s 1 out of 10. That’s also 9 strong leads to work within a month, just from approaching 3 new women a day. This can be from your social circle, cold approaches, Tinder or just about any avenue.

It’s inhuman psychology to overvalue the bad than the good.

One month ago, I had a friend told me he’ll never be my business partner because I was too profit-driven (I was profitable and he wasn’t). One week later, another friend told I’ll make the best business partner because I was accountable would ensure the company makes a profit. Statistically, that’s 50%. However, due to human psychology, the first person’s opinion hurt more than the second.

I find this human effect similar in business and other areas of life. If you went out and approached a 100 women, 10 of them that you’re extremely attractive and 90 of them told you that you’re an asshole, you’re going start thinking that you’re an asshole without valuing the fact that 10 out of a 100 though you’re extremely attractive. That’s just human nature.

Don’t take things Personally

These days I learned not to take things personally, in business or in dating.

I get rejected a ton (if any tells you otherwise, they are bullshitting you) and I get labels and opinions on me as a person. They can range from miserly, to foolish, to smart to ‘X’ personality trait.

In social psychology, there’s an argument that people behave accordingly to their situations, as opposed to their innate personality traits. They may be reacting in jest, or merely under those circumstances. There’s nothing you need to take personally, especially so if it’s from a stranger.

Now, I’m not saying that you need to go out being an asshole. However, a basic grasp of statistics can help you behave wisely and accordingly. Through the years I get a couple of negative comments on how I handle certain areas of my life. However, if I looked at feedback objectively, half of the people I interact with may think I’m an asshole, half of the world is going to think otherwise. Statistically speaking, if half the world thinks you’re an asshole, you’re still doing fine. You can’t please everyone.