If you’re actively attempting to better your dating life by cold approaching and trying to get more ‘leads’ into your phone. Sooner or later you’re going to realise that dating is a numbers game.
One new heuristic I adopted over the years is: whatever gets measured, gets accomplished. I was doing a slight form of that through the years, by tracking appointments, time and scheduling out gym workouts, classes, putting aside time for work, ahead of time and wasn’t too strict on this through the years. I experienced one of my biggest business growth in years after adopting this heuristic. If you put in the work, measure your results, you’re going to get success far faster than everybody else.
You can measure:
If you make it a point to approach 3 women everyday, that’s 90 women a month. Let’s assume out of 10 women, you get a strong ‘lead’. That’s 1 out of 10. That’s also 9 strong leads to work with in a month, just from approaching 3 new women a day. This is not account for your leads from your social circle, Tinder or just about any avenue.
It’s human psychology to overvalue the bad than the good. I find this human effect similar in business and our dating life. If you went out and approached a hundred women, 10 of them that you’re extremely attractive and 90 of them told you that you’re an asshole, you’re going start thinking that you’re an asshole without valuing the fact that 10 out of a 100 thought you’re extremely attractive. That’s part of our human psychology.
In social psychology there’s an argument that people behave accordingly to their situations, as opposed to their innate personality trait. They may be reacting in jest, or merely under those circumstances. There’s nothing you need to take personally, especially so if it’s from a stranger.
These days I learned not to take things personally, in business or in dating. I get rejected a ton (if any tells you otherwise, they are bullshitting you) and I get labels and opinions on me as a person. They can range from being an asshole, to being foolish, to being smart to ‘X’ personality trait.