Through the years, one of my best skillsets: is the art of learning a new skillset fast. That’s because I needed to be highly adaptable in business, running the entire site myself. If you noticed, MarcusNeo.Com is a culmination of multiple skill sets from SEO, content marketing, email copywriting and years of studying multiple subjects from psychology, social skills and personal finance.
An adversary once said to me, if you had a personal brand, it should be titled rebel millionaire. That’s because I ‘break all the rules’. However, I don’t break the rules because I’m a rebel, I break it because I’m an innovator. If you signed up for my email newsletter, you’ll quickly notice that my emails are like none others. If you read my blog, you’ll notice that my articles are unique and controversial.
Needless to say, acquiring skillsets fast is paramount to solving life problems from relationships to business.
The question is, how can you learn a new skill fast? Let me introduce you to my engines of learning.
Engine 1: Surround Yourself with the Like-Minded Individuals
I don’t need to say this already. Your environment plays a huge role. If your closest five friends are giving you shit for trying out something new such as learning a new skillset. You’re more likely not going to try it. You’re also less likely going to persist with it.
You’ll need a learning, open-minded and nurturing environment. How do you do so? Simply put yourself into it:
- Sign up for classes, get a coach
- Surround yourself with like-minded individuals
- Find a mentor
When I was under tutelage by a professional dating coach back then, I surrounded myself with other like-minded individuals. Some of there are a decade older than I was. They all wanted to better their dating lives. It was a positive learning environment where I felt freer to discuss and talk about our problems, not to mention the accountability.
Engine 2: Understand The Principles Behind Motivation and Anxiety
If you’re just starting out in music and all your friends around you are already full-time musicians that can shred a minor scale whilst doing a backflip whilst you’re struggling with chords. You’re not going to enjoy your time around them. It’s also going to give you a huge amount of anxiety.
The trick here is to limit exposure to people or stimuli that trigger that anxiety. This a psychologically researched method to help people overcome their anxiety.
There’s something to be said about having friends and family around you and supporting you. I get that. However, if your close friends around you are criticizing you for your pursuits, then you’re better off limiting your exposure to them. However, if you feel awful expressing an idea to Mum or Dad, then limiting your time around them whilst you learn a certain skill set can be helpful.
Something that I learned early on: is that people of similar life values often end up together. The majority of my friends in my earlier twenties didn’t get my obsession with my pursuit of getting good with girls. That’s because they had social circles from University and work. On my end, I didn’t want to rely on anyone. When I started my business, I rambled about esoteric digital marketing strategies to my friends. I’m pretty sure a part of them secretly hated me for stepping up.
Engine 3: Judge Yourself By Your Intentions and Not by the Results
In a results-based society, the outcome of your actions is often judged, as opposed to your intentions. What if you tried another degree, some other pursuit and you failed?
If you starting learning social skills to get better in your relationships. Your friends might say that you’re strange. However, what are your intentions behind learning socials? They are to better your relationships. It’s something that’s positive.
What if you started a business, and it flunks?
If it failed, some of your critics might say:
- You’re escaping responsibility from a job.
- You’re running away from reality.
However, if you judged yourself through your own intentions, you’re potentially creating something that is important to you and maybe that something that will pay off for your financial future in the long run. You’re already a success.
Engine 4: Keep Your Identity Flexible
You don’t do the things you do, or pick up different skills is because of beliefs and stories you believed that is true about yourself. You may have always identified yourself as the rebel or the dropout. However deep down, you may be actually too afraid to do well in school. That’s going to confront your identity of yourself. Hence, you never bothered to re-learn that area of your life.
Our identity is made up of how you and I perceive the world. It’s made up of our beliefs and values. If you’ve always believed yourself to be a good person, you’ll find situations and information from the outside world to confirm that belief and identity.
Question is, can you change that part of yourself, the beliefs and build a new identity for yourself?
You can’t replace your old identity with a brand new one. However, you can supplement your old identity with a more diversified identity. It’s not about ripping out your old self and trying to replace it with a completely different one. It’s about integrating your old self, into something more courageous, sexier and bolder than the current one.
Keeping your identity flexible and diversified not only helps you pick up skills fast, it also helps with overall self-esteem.
For Example, If you’re merely invested in your pick up artist identity, whenever you’re NOT dating a hot girl, you’ll feel absolutely horrible about yourself. That’s because that’s only metric you are measuring yourself against. If you’ve always only been the finance guy that is good at making money, if the stock market crashes and you lose a lot of money, you’re going to feel like an absolute failure.
However, if you diversified your identity as a friend, student, entrepreneur, martial artist etc… then when you’re hitting a bad patch, you’ll won’t feel like it’s the end of the world.
Of course, it’s easier said than done. You can be lead a well-balanced life but still, derive the majority of your validation and self-worth from the only couple of sources. The usuals: money and the opposite sex. This is especially so when you’re looking to better yourself at one aspect of life, you tend to measure yourself against those metrics.
I’m no stranger to this. I’m running a dating advice site. In my own life, my clients are looking to me to teach them how to attract women, my articles are on how to attract women and in my own personal life when a girl rejects me, I’m getting all butt hurt about it. ‘I’m supposed to be good at this right!?!’
Sometimes, it becomes depersonalized, the lines between personal life, work and my social life are blurred. At one point, I was taking part in activities for the sake of getting to know more girls and not for the sake of the activity itself.
Needless to say, I crashed and burned when things don’t go my way. That’s because I can’t control anyone’s reaction to me. That’s an external metric. Furthermore, my emotional life cannot be quantified and measured in that way. It was only when I started writing for the sake of writing, being social for the sake of enjoying being around people that I began to take things more lightly.
Engine 5: Embrace The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck
If there’s something that helped learn skills quickly, be extremely adaptable to my environment, booking that one-way ticket, changing careers, dropping out of school, saying Hi to a stranger or purchasing a one way trip to another country, these actions boils down to some level choosing the right things to give a fuck about.
There are lots of life situations that are similar positions. To make that investment or not. It’s actually simple: just buy that fucking stock. To ask that girl out or not? Simple, just ask her out. To fly to another country or not, it’s simple, just buy that damned ticket.
The way to master a skill fast is to completely immerse yourself in it. Yes, you need mental frameworks and systems. However, some chaos can actually helpful.
I’ll quote Richard Feynman on this: study hard what interests you the most, in the most undisciplined, irreverent and original manner possible. I used to spend all my time in the martial arts gym, hopping from class to class. I’ll do a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu class after boxing class, and then Muay Thai class. I didn’t limit myself to one set of movement. That helped a lot if making me an all rounded martial artist. I am able to defend myself from all positions, standing up or on the ground.
Sorry, my friend. Learning fast isn’t about beautifying your notes with 6 different colours or try to be all calm. No, in the real life, here at MarcusNeo.Com, in our life coaching programs, you’re going to get a no B.S. approach. If you’re going to learn a skill fast or try out, you need to embrace the subtle art of not giving a fuck and let yourself be that playful child again.